Most people have heard of the term “non-negotiable,” but this can mean something different to each individual. What might be a must-have quality for one person could be a preference for another person. Some might believe a certain trait is non-negotiable but later discover that their perspective evolves with time and experience. This isn’t necessarily a matter of someone having “better” values but a matter of what each person holds as their core values. This article will explore common non-negotiables in a relationship and ways to receive support for relationship challenges.
Honesty
While most people say that honesty is an absolute must-have quality in a partner, each couple’s level of openness may vary. If someone finds out that their romantic partner hasn’t been honest about their past relationships, for example, they may decide that the relationship won’t work. Honesty can also extend to the way that people treat their friends and coworkers. Honest behavior across all relationships can be an attractive feature that leads an individual to trust another person and form a successful partnership with them.
Open communication
Most people state that strong communication is a non-negotiable in a relationship, but it can be challenging to maintain open communication throughout the life of a relationship. Often, communication seems smooth and almost effortless at the beginning of a relationship, but strong communication can be difficult to maintain over time. People’s needs and values can change, and the nature of a specific relationship can evolve over time.
How to improve communication
To ensure that open communication remains a core common value, couples may benefit from scheduling regular time together. Dedicated time together can allow couples to stay connected and communicate what they’re experiencing on a regular basis. Regular communication can also lead to greater intimacy, which, in turn, can enhance communication, creating a positive cycle that leads to growth in a relationship.
Commitment to personal growth for both mind and body
For some people, it’s important to be with a partner who demonstrates a commitment to personal growth. This can mean a commitment to caring for their health, as evidenced by regular exercise and pushing oneself toward fitness goals, for instance. A commitment to personal growth can also mean caring for the mind through practices like mindfulness, meditation, and regular reading. For some people, a commitment to personal growth might entail seeing a therapist from time to time to care for their mental health.
Core value or values
To some people, it may be of vital importance to have a partner who prioritizes specific values. For example, some people may want to be with a person who shows a commitment to giving back to the community through donations or volunteer work. To other people, having a similar faith tradition is a non-negotiable for a healthy relationship. Having a common faith tradition may allow people to navigate life decisions from a similar perspective. To other people, having the same faith tradition isn’t paramount, but having mutual respect for each other’s beliefs and family members is vital to their relationship.
Financial security
For many people, finding someone who is financially stable is an absolute must in a relationship. This doesn’t necessarily mean that people are looking for someone with plenty of personal wealth. They may just want to know that their partner strives to avoid debt and works toward a financially secure future.
How relationship counseling may help
While non-negotiables can guide people in their relationship decisions, many people still experience questions and concerns about their relationships. When this occurs, individuals or couples may benefit from relationship counseling. Relationship counseling can help people assess their expectations and evaluate their current non-negotiables. This doesn’t necessarily mean changing one’s values but determining what is currently most important on one’s personal journey.
Online relationship counseling
Some couples may live in an area with few relationship counselors. Others may prefer to speak with a counselor outside of their local community. In these cases, online therapy can serve as a way for couples to receive evidence-based support without leaving their homes. With Regain, couples can speak with a licensed couples counselor via audio, video, or live chat at a time that works for them. For individuals who prefer to speak with a counselor one-on-one, Dr.mindconnect offers a network of more than 25,000 licensed professionals who can help people navigate relationship issues and personal doubts related to their non-negotiables.
In addition to offering flexible communication options and a large pool of therapists, online therapy has a strong basis of support in scientific research. One study found that online cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) was even more effective than in-person CBT for treating symptoms of depression, which may be common in people experiencing serious relationship challenges.
Takeaway
Non-negotiables in relationships often guide people as they search for partners or navigate relationship challenges. Common non-negotiables include honesty, open communication, financial stability, and a commitment to personal growth.
If you have questions about your personal non-negotiables in a relationship, you might consider speaking with a licensed therapist. With Dr. Mindconnect, most people are matched with a therapist within 48 hours, and you can change therapists at any time until you find the right fit for your unique needs.
